I know, I know, heck, we ALL know by now that silence is not golden, but rather, indicative of darkness.

Boy, that sounded ominous didn’t it?

Kinda like life sometimes.

Anyway, since I can’t possibly update you all on the last few days/weeks, let us play a game instead.

Is everyone familiar with the classic ice breaker, two truths and a lie?

Good; let’s play:

1.  I have a fairy godmother of sorts. She took me shopping last weekend.

2. David was keenly aware of my needs and actually took care of the kids AND dinner on Tuesday night without my asking.

3. I broke down today when discussing Jakiepoo.

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Are you thinking?

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No, seriously, you have to play.

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Pick the lie.

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If you guessed #2 you are….

*

*

*

WRONG!

#3 is the lie.

But let’s rehash,

#1 My fairy godmother is actually Lizbeth. To be perfectly honest, God’s given me a whole slew of truly amazing, fairy godmother-esque women in my life. But this particular best friend took my sorry self shopping. I now actually have appropriate church attire for winter! Woot!

#2 Surprise! I’ve been more than a wee bit depressed/anxious/pseudo-crazy lately. But Tuesday was the worst. A co-worker and friend learned she’d lost her son at nearly 32 weeks gestation…I lost it. I consider myself a fairly empathetic person, but oh, that was intense. My heart aches for her, for my sister Chris who delivered too soon at 17 weeks 4 years ago, for my friend who has miscarried time after time, and for myself.

Which brings me to,

#3 I had a message today from Jakie’s former residence’s social worker asking me to speak to a family.

I’ve been suppressing serious guilt lately for not being an overachiever. Sometimes, I’m just so inadequate. I have a ‘never able to measure up’ complex and it’s been all systems go lately.

Anyway, I did it.

I called the family and I didn’t even shake, throw up, or burst into tears.

Not even when the mom asked me how my son was doing now.

I kid you not.

Somehow, this distraught mother missed the key fact that my child is dead.

That was awesome.

not.

Pray for me.

In case you couldn’t tell, I’m significantly lacking in the ‘grin and bear it’ category.

It’s the lawsuit thing.
and the Adriana switching schools thing.
and the November thing.
and the late on the mortgage thing.
and the woe-is-me worldview thing.

but there’s this other thing,

I hear there’s a GRACE and MERCY thing too, a HOLY God kinda thing:

¹⁴As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance. ¹⁵But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do;

1 Peter 1:14-15

So here I am, trying my very best to no longer live in ‘ignorance’ and not hate myself for when I do.

thing in the morning we almost miss the bus because Adriana’s book bag is tangled in the blinds!

We’re still working out mornings around here with the new schedule, but currently it looks something like this:

5:30 am David wakes up & showers

6:00am David wakes me up & I assist with dressing Adriana & start household cleaning

6:20 am Adriana starts yelling out the window for the bus, “Time, bus. Time, bus,” she says over and over until…

6:35 am Adriana boards the bus as Taylor wakes up; David leaves for work

7am Taylor leaves to catch the bus, I steal 10 minutes to myself

7:10am Little girls are woken up, if not already awake, they eat & dress

7:45am Little girls & I drop Avery off at school and head to preschool/work

As much as I hate not being able to be everywhere at once, I do prefer the flow of a staggard morning routine. It is much simpler to ready one or two kids at a time, heck even four, than it is is six!

You might have guessed as much, but afternoons are a wee bit different these days too. For starters, we only have to go to for allergy shots once a week now instead of twice. Did I mention we now have to pay $25 per shot? *sigh*

Mondays are a rush to get Avery picked up from school, the four little girls in and out of the doctor’s office and back home in time for Adriana’s roughly 3:45pm bus drop off!

Usually, the girls play outside until Adriana comes home, then all five girls play for a bit before heading in for snack and homework.

In school transition news, Adriana is doing beautifully, despite the morning bus despair =P She is so clearly happy it is remarkable. Adriana is constantly giving hugs now and she is not a touchy feely kinda kid. Her homework isn’t a battle, yet still challenges her. Yesterday, Adriana was given the sentence:

“Draw a picture of you in the third hot air balloon.”

Adriana wrote her name-LOL! Still a ways to go, but it isnt’ the earth shattering battle it once was.

Starting this week, Taylor is home in the afternoons! That kiddo and his daddy have been at odds over a 71 in Science…apparently Taylor isn’ t so much a fan of studying, but David is bound and determined to change that! We shall see!

There is something comforting about having all my children home and settled before their Daddy arrives home from his work day. Just call be June Cleaver.

Should anyone out there in blogland need a Christian inspiration for getting your bum in gear around the house, here’s one that convicted me the other day- Proverbs 24:33-34:

A little sleep, a little slumber,
       a little folding of the hands to rest-

  and poverty will come on you like a bandit
       and scarcity like an armed man.

I know! Yikes, right!

Let’s just say, that’s been more than a little true around here as of late

Wish you were here,

wish you could see this place

Wish you were near, I wish I could touch your face

The weather’s nice, it’s paradise
It’s summertime all year and there’s some folks we know

They say, “Hello, I miss you so, wish you were here”

I love you mom. I miss  you more than every memory combined. I miss you more than the tears that fall this day.

Two years and eternity…November 5th, 2009.

I have no less than 53523 updates running through my head.

Fortunately, for those compelled to read my nonsense, I will not share all that is consuming me.

We’ll start with Monday.

That’s Adriana shortly after arriving at her new school.

She cried all morning.

She tried repeatedly to convince me that it was not Monday (we had told her on Monday she starts at the new school).

She cried beyond all reason when I reminded her the bus would take her home in the afternoon.  I mean, hysterics. Finally, bless her heart, she signed, “Adriana ride the bus-YAY!” Only, she was crying as she signed it–the most pitiful sight ever.

The poor child was literally shaking walking into the building.

Right up until she found the locker with her name on it. That locker saved the morning. She was thrilled! The rest of the day, bus drop off included went remarkably well.

Praise God!

But Monday just kept getting better.

Taylor was making a tackle during football practice. He made contact alright.

A contact so strong that he immediately started whimpering and crying and couldn’t speak.

He left the field on a stretcher and headed to the hospital via ambulance.

It was terrifying.

In light of full disclosure, I let God have it, when I got the phone call. I was livid with God. I could only assume the worst when I heard, “ambulance, neck/head injury.”

I couldn’t even summon the wits to phone my closest friends for prayer. In fact, I instead got on my hands and knees to sweep the kitchen floor.

Once my sister arrived to care for the girls, I made it the football field. They said Taylor had been signing for me and finally spoke once I climbed into the ambulance.

*heartache*

Blessedly, after multiple x-rays and a CT scan, Taylor was given the diagnosis of a concussion. The ER doctor gave him an alphabet soup of prescriptions and we finally headed for home around 10pm.

Oh, I’ll be answering to God for my behavior in the ER though…you know that pesky H1N1 hospital policy about no children? They mean it. Even if you call them ahead of time and ask. They made me leave with Lucy. So I sat in the parking lot and cursed.

Meanwhile, the assistant principal, athletic director, our small group leader and all three football coaches came to check in on Taylor. Pretty awesome.

But don’t worry, the good news doesn’t end there folks.

That’s right, we had Tuesday morning waiting for us.

Miss Adriana had her barium swallow study done that morning. A routine procedure that I had requested after Adriana’s recent choking episodes.

Turns out our girl is aspirating all thin liquids (‘thin’ by the way cracks me up, what exactly is a ‘heavy’ liquid?). Anyway, that means two things:

1) Adriana can no longer drink anything that has not been ‘thickened.’  We must add Thick-It or a similar substance, purchased over the counter–$20 for a one week supply, to everything she drinks.

2) It was recommended that Adriana switch to a special cup that only allows for 5-10cc of fluid at a time. The cups are $40-50 each!

I suppose there is a third thing.

This is a permanent condition. One that would get worse not better, as Adriana grows.

Awesome right?

I swear I’m really trying to break the crazy cycle.

Only today, I contacted our lawyer concerning a civil summons (I cannot believe I am sharing this) I received last week.

For those who don’t know, last fall we surrendered to a debt management agency in an effort to ‘fix’ the financial nightmare we had made.

In any case, I am being sued by one of our debt collectors.

The idea behind a debt management group is they work on your behalf to settle your debts. One way the collectors can put the pressure on you to settle with them first is by taking you to court.

Who am I and how did I get here?

Long story short, I now have to come up with a very large sum of money in order to avoid court.

I’m just so unimpressed with myself.

I’ve been focusing a lot recently on sinful nature during devotionals. What a beast of  thing.

I literally had to write out, “I’m forgiven,” on a notepad before making the phone call to the lawyer today.

As shameful as it is for me to confess all that, I do so in an effort to educate my children, as this blog is for them after all.

So kids, don’t do what I did.

Don’t be stupid.

Don’t think consumerism will save you from pain or even ease it.

It just adds more sorrow to the valley.

You’ll have to excuse my sour  demeanor…just imagine if you had to actually speak to me! I’m a walking ray of sunshine

As much as I hate November, I’m starting to think it hates me more.

This weekend marked the 5^th annual fall beach trip (excluding 2007, that year we all headed to Boone, NC for Aunt Bonnie’s wedding!).

Our trip consists of the five siblings, our spouses and children. Unfortunately, this year, my brother John & his wife & daughter couldn’t make it. They were missed! The ‘originals’:

From left to right, it’s me, Michael, Christina, and Bonnie.

 The next generation!

Naturally, there was trick-or-treating fun to be had at Broadway at the Beach:

 

 

 

Taylor and Adriana didn’t dress up but enjoyed the chaos along with the rest of us. Bonnie, Jesse, David and myself kept entertained playing ‘Bingo’ aka find all the inappropriately dressed females and shouting, “Bingo!’

Even Lucy got in on the candy action, but no worries, I didn’t actually let her eat any! 

 

 okay, so maybe a little lick!

When we just couldn’t take any more of the crowds,

 we headed back to the hotel for a spaghetti dinner & candy swap!

 

When we weren’t hanging out at the hotel,

 

we were busy at the beach! Playing in the sand,

 

 

watching for dolphins, we seriously saw them!

 and posing for mommy’s countless photo ops. Can you tell it was Miss Lucy’s first ever trip to the beach? =P 

 

 

 

 and out-takes!

So, yeah, I *might* have gone a tad bit crazy trying to get the above photo, but dude, this is the one place where ALL seven kids can sorta kinda be in one picture you know?

Oh, and just before that picture, the fire alarm was pulled (no real harm) which called for hysterical little girls marching down 12 flights of stairs!

Yikes.

Anyhow, we made it home…eventually and all in one piece!

Funny story, this morning I scan through my email and note one from my friend Lisa. Her email contained some serious encouragement, that I doubt she, or anyone, had any idea I needed to hear, a true gift from God!

With my spirit fed, I felt better prepared to conquer my day. The big four girls were loaded in the van and Lucy assumed her regular morning spot in the Bumbo seat.

I grabbed Goosey girl, the diaper bag, and having eyed my hot, tempting coffee cup; decided to hold off on it until the next run to and from the van.

I then ventured to a van full of girls and felt something distinctly, well, gross on my hand.

Uh oh.

Holy Spirit don’t leave me now.

I laughed in lieu of crying.

Setting the diaper bag in the van I marched right back inside and all but hosed Lucy, the pooping wonder (what IS it about that Bumbo seat?), down. Seriously, It got on everything but her socks.

And, that, my dear friends, is a typical moment in the life of Katie. Up one minute, covered in poo the next.

Let’s just say, this past week has contained a wee bit more of the poo covered moments than the spirit lifting kind.

Rather than re-hash, re-cap or backtrack, I’ll say three things:

1. The IEP meeting was yesterday.

2. Adriana will start the new school on Monday, yes this coming Monday. November 2nd.

3. Avery is vice president of her class and that suited her just fine.

Everything else is in the details, some more important than others…I’m still reeling form the IEP madness and waiting for confirmation of full-blown internal hysteria

1. No concussion! However, per county policy, Taylor will still sit out for a week (w/out the doctor’s go-ahead, it would have been three weeks!).

2. Livie & Lila had their pictures made at school today. It wasn’t suppose to be today, but both girls were willing (a rare event) so we ran with it.

3. Avery and I took a pre-dinner walk that was lovely; plus we enjoyed chatting it up with our friends down the street… =)

4. I’m making progress with the whole future fertility debate; thanks to prayer and a loving husband.

5. Adriana majorly choked last night–that’s 3 times in the last week or so. The doctor is calling in a referral for another swallow study.

6. I really LOVE NCIS.

7. I’m down 6lbs since I started this round of let’s-get-the-fat-off!

8. Disney World is in my 5 year plan, but I’ll settle for the beach next weekend maybe.

9. I love how stretching the grocery budget means serving ‘chicken’ pot pies, minus the chicken and no one notices the difference.

10. Still debating on whether or not Lucy should attend small group with us tomorrow night or try the nursery again–feel free to leave your vote in the comments.

Done.

Rumor has it, picture day will result in much better quality photos if your child isn’t dressed like an orphan.

You know it’s bad when your director knocks on your classroom door and politely asks, “Did I lose Lila’s bow?”

Uh, no, mop head came to school without one.

Yeah. I totally forgot today was picture day for Lila–she was/is a hot mess of hair and hand me downs.

Do I get credit for remembering Lucy’s picture day?

Luckily, we were able to switch Lila’s picture day to Thursday. The problem is, it’s picture week at our preschool and with three different kids attending, well, you get the idea!

In mommy defense, I really didn’t even expect to go to school/work today. Lucy has been ill  and had a wretched screaming fit in the middle of the night…and yeah, I suck.

In other news, Avery stumbled upon the perils of being left-handed while working on her election poster this weekend.

 Bless her heart, she smudged the WHOLE thing! We sacrificed it as best as we could.

 

Oh, that kid also scored her second season goal on Saturday!

Waiting for me after work this morning was a rather creatively separated laundry room. Today is Adriana’s laundry day and bless her heart, she attempted to separate it on her own. Who says she can’t be independent?! =)

At pick up time, A’s interpreter was full of excitement. The interpreter taught Adriana the ASL way to keep score when playing a game- a huge hit.

From school we were off to our favorite Monday afternoon destination–the doctor’s office for Lila’s allergy shots.

No improvement there…the doctor stopped in to peak at her and told her how brave she was yada yada and Lila looks up and says, “My stickers?”

If there’s one thing Lila’s learned, it’s that shots = stickers =)

uh oh.

David just walked in with Taylor. After a hard hit during football practice he’s showing signs of a concussion. The trainer wants us to take him to the doctor first thing tomorrow to rule out/confirm a concussion. Please pray he’s okay.

 8:40 am

The house is quiet. David is en route to the doctor’s office with Lila for allergy shots. Livie is upstairs watching tv in her room and the Goose is playing on the floor. The telephone rings.

“Hello.”

“Mrs. Apple? This is {Adriana’s interpreter}. Adriana came to school without a bib today.”

Trying my best not to snort into the phone, “Well, David got them ready today.”

interpreter: “OH, okay! Adriana kept signing ‘Daddy’ and now I know why! Could you bring bibs up to the school please?”

Later that day…

11:00 am

Pushing a cart full of little girls, I wander past the laundry aisle at Sam’s Club.

me, while turning the cart around, “I don’t know where my brain is this morning!”

Livie, ever so serious, “I don’t know where it is. What does it look like Mommy? I’ll help you find it.”

2:20pm

Once again, the phone rings.

me: “Hey, what’s up?” (caller id anyone?)

Avery, in the most precious six year old voice says,

“Mommy, I got nominated to be president!”

A few more questions later and I got the full story, LOL. I’m so proud of her! Avery’s teacher has her students elect a class president every year (duties include chosing helpers, etc).

Avery was one of four peer-nominated students to be chosen to ‘run’ for president. She’ll have to make a poster and give a class speech next Friday. She is SO excited it just took my breath away….LOVE IT!

 

Immediately upon walking in the door, Avery begins to narrate her speech & plot her poster.

“Dear Class,

Please vote for Avery. I love my class. I finish my work and I’m smart.

{aside} Oh, Mommy, can we draw hearts on it?”

Some days, I LOVE my life =)